The DDDance moves are becoming more intricate. As her memory is increasingly full of holes, she’s filling in with her imagination without realizing it. Of course even those of us with healthy brains do this: even scientists show unconscious bias when interpreting test results that support or contradict their expectations. Our imaginations perform a critical function in filtering and sewing together our perceptions and memories. But now when she misremembers, others are scrambling for how to handle this as she insists that something happened that didn’t, etc. Together he, Jane and I are getting better and not contradicting her but simply moving on to her other things, because THERE IS NO LOGIC-ING DEMENTIA!

Meanwhile he remains confident in their ability to move back to Kingston, and go back to having their own place in which he can once more run the show. She of course realizes that this is crazy and is incredibly grateful to me for the support I’m giving them both. And so we move onto other things without stopping to argue the point, as THERE IS NO LOGIC-ING DEMENTIA!

But with his memory now really degrading, they end up both becoming confused, but so long as they’re letting me support them, it’s ok. But if they together get something into their head, like going out for dinner together without me knowing about it, the risk level is increasing. I will have to get the Altzheimer’s style locks that they will be unable to figure out, but will not stop us or emergency personnel from getting in, as we continue to make adjustments in supporting what level of functioning they still have.

Just the other day, she wanted to stay home and relax while I took him to an appointment, but I knew that she was likely to panic once she had been alone for a while. It wasn’t easy to talk her into coming, but in the end she acquieced and we had a nice time visiting the hospital together, because they are a charming and delightful couple, and the nurses were personable, kind and effective.

I am so grateful that they spend most of their time content, enjoying as they can the life that they live. They are such a blessed couple, who have blessed so many in their time of ministry. It is a blessing to be supporting them, despite the trickiness of handling their dementia in a way that mostly leaves them feeling okay and as independent as possible.